King Channing

 Origin: 

King Channing is a king that has died and been resurrected so many times, that his people say they're not even sure if the current one is a descendant or the original. The reason for his resurrections is because of the divines finding entertainment in his constant failure of battle tactics, and selfish behavior. In 3E, 203, Channing received an ostrich from the gods, who he named Earl. Channing has had countless pets, but loved none of them nearly as much as Earl. Earl died many times, usually due to the beast who Channing named the Sandworm. Earl got soultrapped into the plane of Oblivion, known as the Soul Cairn, and has been for many eras. Channing's many failures have had books and stories written (often as comedies), due to the fact that they are thought to be fiction. Sadly, they are not.

 Stories: 

- The Ambush of the Archers

"As King Channing led his mighty troops through the mountain pass, he was ambushed the Dwemer and his troops shoved into grass. Werewolves summoned, by the dwarves, Channing yelled in fright, 'FRICKIN NERDS! THEY'RE RIGHT BY US! SHOW THEM ALL YOUR MIGHT!' Through the shouting, a certain yell, stopped the marchers, the bowmen drew their bows, as their king had shouted 'ARCHERS!!!!'"

- The Bomb of the Castle

"Channing led his forces to the door of the castle, on his way to kill a wizard. Channing rolled a bomb inside, and then yelled 'NO!! I DIDN'T THINK IT'D BLOW UP!!!!'"